MIRACLES DO HAPPEN

Today my class was suppose to have a very tough surgery zachut test (zachut means end of cycle pass to take the final exam). i had been like studying for the past few days but am still nervous for the exam as there are so many topics to study and prepare.

And this morning when i woke up, i really did prayed for a miracle and this miracle happened as my professor was sick and could not make it, so he asked his colleague to give us free zachut. Thank God. But of course still have to prepare well for my finals too as it'll definitely be tough. Over this one whole month of surgery cycle, it's really tiring but i did realized that i learned so much.

Even though i won be considering this as my future field, but to be honest it's actually something interesting and fun. What I've been learning is general surgery, but i really hope that i can see or learn about plastic surgery as it's fun (sort of, i mean it's interesting).And these days, in ophthalmology there is this new laser surgery to correct common eye disorders such as myopia, hyperopia and astigmatism. Well i was actually thinking of going for this surgery to correct my astigmatism but somehow i still have the fear of being operated even though I'm a doctor to be, well have to wait till i get over that fear.There are also facial surgery, to remove tumors etc.For example the pic below shows a girl suffers from a Schwannoma tumor which has been growing on her face since she was 3-years old.The tumor has grown to the point where she is no longer able to eat or speak.It has even kept her from going to school.The surgery is needed to allow her to speak and eat once again.
Well there are just so many interesting surgical procedures worldwide, but somehow there's this controversy where many people are not willing to undergo surgery as they have this perception of fear of dying on the operation theater.

And i really do not deny the fact that all operations or surgical procedures have their own risk but i believe if you are in the hands of a good and experience doctor, then there should not be any problem. But i also will not deny the fact that there are also alternative medicine beside surgery which the patient may feel more comfortable with. But i also think it's up to individuals decision whether do they wanna undergo the operation if they have to.

So we as doctors or future doctors should always be sensitive to our patient's condition and choose the best option for them and not settle every problem with surgery.

some lame jokes on surgery:

WHY CAN'T WE FORGIVE

Yesterday, a friend of mine was being 'tembak kau kau' for the thing she wrote in her blog about M night, almost everyone was against her wanted her out of the university.

well i could not deny that the way and what she wrote was harsh and insensitive and to many people 'racism'.

but one thing i would like to ask is which of us has never say things that hurt others. make mistake, gossip about other nation, race, religion, or people? All of us 'screw up' and make mistakes but what matter most is that whether after u make that mistake, are we willing to 'take responsibility courageously' to seek and ask for forgiveness openly. (and i'm sure many of us has problems or too proud to admit or take responsibility, because i sometimes are like that too)

But this friend of mine has actually posted an apology post on her blog, and that's so courageous of her. So i really hope that those who was offended by that post will be kind, willing and forgiving enough to forgive her and do not cause any more trouble to her.

The reason i said all these is not because she's my friend (if u think I'm like because u're my friend what u do is always right) as i do not approve of what she had done (her 1st post), but because i admire and was awe by her courage to take responsibility.

We do not have the right to condemn a person, as we ourself are not at all perfect, unless u think that u have done no wrong, then i have nothing to say.

Castle adventure (personality Test)

I do not understand why i like personality test so much, maybe it's because i may wanna be a psychiatrist in a future, so i like test that analysis people's personality. Any way, came across this test and it seems fun. well do u DARE to take this test .

Answer what comes naturally to you and take time to really imagine yourself in the situation. Otherwise, it's not so fun... also you don't need to think in a survivalist mode.

1. Imagine yourself on board a boat that is sinking. You manage to swim to a life boat and climb in. How many people do you see in the life boat with you?

2. You row to the shore and see a vast desert before you. You collect some belongings and supplies, and head out across the desert in search of salvation. How many pairs of shoes do you use?

3. After much hard travel, you climb a rise of dunes and see a city in the distance. You also notice an oasis not too far away. Do you stop and rest at the oasis for as long as you want, only rest there for a minute, or keep heading towards the city?

4. Upon entering the city, you see a castle that intrigues you and decide to go to it. After passing the gates you find yourself walking down the length of a long corridor leading to the throne room. You enter and see a king and a queen sitting side by side on the throne. What do both the king and the queen look like? What characteristics do they seem to embody?

5. You leave and go down a spiral stairway. It's dark and shadowy, with torches lit intermittently along the walls. As you're walking down a lady (if you are a man) or a knight (if you are woman) from the court passes you by. You only catch a glimpse of their face, and they remind you of someone you know. Who did you see?

6. The stairs lead you to a banquet room and you see this long table with a golden goblet in the middle of the table. Looking inside the goblet, how full of wine is it?

Don scroll down until you have finish answering

Analysis

1. How many true friends you perceive you have.

2. How many true loves you'll have before getting married.

3. Your personal work ethic.

4. What you imagine your ideal mate to be like.

5. This is the person you'll never get over for the rest of your life.

6. How full it is represents how much of yourself you give in a relationship.

YE!!! 5 DAYS OF HOLIDAYS AND REST

Due to Hitler's birthday (in Moscow or all over Russia, it's consider dangerous for foreigners to go out), we'll have about 5 days of holiday from tomorrow onward till next Tuesday. I'll really need this holiday to have a good rest as i was quite busy and stressful for the past 2 weeks, and also take this time to finish my surgery patient's case history and to do some revision. Life of a medical students is so stressful especially when the final exams are round the corner, but somehow i know that God will pull me through.

It's been a long day

It's been a long day today, i had surgery class from 9am till 2pm and i can tell you that class is really stressing me out. But Thank God i manage to go through today's class. And later at 3.30 i have philosophy class untill about 5.30 and worse thing is the class is in russian and i really understand nothing, but Thank God also today was the last class, meaning i do not have to study this subject anymore for this semester, what a relieve......, but now I'm really tired but i don dare to sleep because I'm might have a sleepless night later (i usually sleep 6 to 8 hours a day, from 12 to 8, or 12 to 7 etc, and my friends all say i sleep like a baby)

TURNER SYNDROME

Today in gynecology class we learned about amenorrhea and one of it's cause is turner syndrome. Turner syndrome is a congenital disease which is caused by a missing or incomplete X chromosome. People who have Turner syndrome develop as females. The genes affected are involved in growth and sexual development, which is why girls with the disorder are shorter than normal and have abnormal sexual characteristics.We also learn about turner mosaic. what does mosaicism mean here? mosaicism actually means that instead of chromosome changes, changes occur in the gene locus inside the chromosome causing female to have some small signs of a particular disease like turner syndrome but the condition is not as severe as turner syndrome (for example: patient outward appearance may look like they have turner syndrome like short stature or stocky appearance but their genital organs actually function normally and there's no mental retardation).

My lecturer then further says that there is a stipulation on all human being including you and I, we have mosaic of genetic hereditary diseases for example cancer, connective tissue disease, hypertension, it's just how much do we manifest it only by our lifestyle and environmental factors. so we need to live our life well and healthily to prevent the manifestation of these diseases.

A fruitful weekend

The weekend that had passed was a meaningful weekend. Many things happened but yet i can see that God is in control of everything. We had the Love factor on Saturday and to me personally it was really meaningful and what i learn that night was Love factor is actually God factor, to understand what real love is, we have to know who God is and experience His love.

And on Sunday church service, Pastor John Ollis shared on finishing well in our walk with God. Many thinks that Christianity is just accepting Christ and that's it, but actually there's more to that we need to live our life as a living sacrifice for Him and always willing to be humble and surrender fully to Him. Pastor John also pointed out some of the ways to do so.

Then later in the evening we had a leadership meeting with pastor John on how to be a better man and woman for God, the criteria of priesthood that we as God's children should have as we're God's royal priesthood. Well thought out this whole weekend, even though i was so call busy and don't really have much time for my studies but somehow i find myself learning more and how to be the person God wants me to be. and to me this is definitely something i can never learn from my medical textbook.

And thank God when i went to class with His presence beside me, i can answer the question my professor asked me and thank God for that and all glories go to Him as He is the greatest physician in my life.

Abortion???

This month I'm having gynecology and surgery cycle (rounds). My gynecology teacher is an intelligent, soft spoken and a humble person. He teaches and explains well in class and while seeing procedures. i remember on Tuesday he was asking us what kind of procedure are we interested in. then someone asked whether can we see abortion procedure (in Malaysia abortion is illegal unless there's some medical reason or whatsoever but here the law is different). Upon hearing this my teacher was kinda upset, he couldn't understand why are people so interested in abortions (as many other groups has requested to see abortion too).

is this what we wish to see, gross isn't it???

He then explained and told us that he believe that baby (pregnancy) is given by something from above to the mothers. We as doctors do not have the right to harm or destroy (abortion is done by breaking the life chorion or embryo into smaller pieces and then remove it by curettage) the embryo or fetus. Even though the embryo or fetus may not be well formed yet but it's still a living organism living in a mother's womb. He also thinks that seeing abortion is somewhat depressing and not good, it's better to see birth. This is how abortion is done. to me it's cruel and depressing

For me i believe that unless there are certain medical reason, we as doctors or even mother to the baby should never consider abortion as an option as it is a life given by God and we don have the right to take away one's life (no matter what selfish reason we may have). And from the medical point of view, abortion may also lead to other complication like infection or future infertility for those who later in life might want to have children.

Well talking about my teacher i really respect him not just as a doctor but also his morality as a doctor. i hope that one day if i were to be a specialist in obstetric and gynecology I'll be like him and of course not to forget the Great Physician of my life.

WANNA HAVE SOME FUN: CAKE PERSONALITY TEST

Wanna have some fun or a laugh, i found this test somewhere and i find it kinda interesting. Hope you enjoy it:

If you were buying a cake and you had your choice of the following which would you choose?

Angel food
Brownies
Lemon Meringue
Vanilla with Chocolate Icing
Strawberry Short Cake
Chocolate on Chocolate
Ice Cream
Carrot Cake

PLEASE DO NOT LOOK AT THE ANALYSIS UNTIL YOU CHOOSE AN ANSWER!!!

Analysis

Now that you've made your choice, this is what research says about you!

Angel food - Sweet, loving, cuddly. You love all warm and fuzzy items. A little nutty at times. Sometimes you need an ice cream cone at the end of the day. Others perceive you as being child-like and immature at times.

Brownies - You are adventurous, love new ideas, are a champion of underdogs and a slayer of dragons. When tempers flare up, you whip out your saber. You are always the oddball with a unique sense of humor and direction. You tend to be very loyal.

Lemon Meringue - Smooth, sexy & articulate with your hands, you are an excellent after-dinner speaker and a good teacher. But don't try to walk and chew gum at the same time. A bit of a diva at times, but you have many friends.

Vanilla with Chocolate Icing - Fun-loving, sassy, humorous. Not very grounded in life, very indecisive and lack motivation. Everyone enjoys being around you, but you are a practical joker. Others should be cautious in making you mad, however, you are a friend for life.

Strawberry Short Cake - Romantic, warm, loving. You care about other people and can be counted on in a pinch. You tend to melt. You can be overly-emotional and annoying at times.

Chocolate on Chocolate - Sexy, always ready to give and receive. Very creative, adventurous, ambitious, and passionate. You have a cold exterior but are warm on the inside. Not afraid to take chances. Will not settle for anything average in life. Love to laugh.

Ice Cream - You like sports, whether it be baseball, football, basketball, or soccer. If you could, you would like to participate, but you enjoy watching sports. You don't like to give up the remote control. You tend to be self-centered and high maintenance.

Carrot Cake - You are a very fun loving person, who likes to laugh. You are fun to be with. People like to hang out with you. You are a very warm-hearted person and a little quirky at times. You have many loyal friends.

Love Factor

This saturday at 6.30 in yunost hotel, there'll be a seminar or would i say conference by Pastor John Ollis from Hillsong Australia. He's gonna talk about the topic love. Many think that they know what love is all about. But to me Love is something easily say but not done and it really take God's strength for me to be able to show the kind of love He wants me to show.

I'm actually really looking forward to hear what Pastor John Ollis got to say as i know that what he say will not only be powerful but also life changing. He came last year to speak in the Malaysian Fellowship and also in church and i can say that He's a man of God, very wise,knowledgeable,and with authority but at the same time humble and friendly.

Thus as i say I'm looking forward to hear what God say through him about love, as i want to be a person who loves the way God want me to towards my family, my friends, my future patients and others.

Sprain or bone crack

During one of my trauma class last week, we discuss about sprain. Then somehow a question came across my mind. here was the question:

If we're working in a rural hospital without Xray, or any other kind of modern technologies and equipment, and one day a patient came complaining that he had hurt his ankle. (not bleeding or wound, just bend or hit something etc). How then are we suppose to know whether is it a sprain or is it a crack in the bone (not displaced fractures, just crack) without the help of X ray.

There are answer like refer patient to a bigger hospital with X ray ( but what if the patient is not willing to go so far for some reason). well yes we can apply the RICE method and prescribe some pain killer.

R-rest
I- ice application
C- compression
E- elevation of affected part

but what i really want to know is that whether is there a way to differentiate a sprain and a bone crack just by general examination and palpation etc without using x ray or other modern techniques.

So feel free to comment on any ways to differentiate these 2 problems. thanks.

My Group mates

The 2 men sitting in front are my teacher for trauma

Today as I went to class, I was thinking on what to write for the blog. And then I decided to write on my group. My group as small as it may seem consist of a bunch of interesting people with unique characters. Even though we’re from different nationality, races, sexes, religion we tend to get along pretty well in many ways.

As I mentioned we have various characters here in my group: ‘study’ freaks; ‘shopping’ freaks; ‘beauty’ freaks; ‘eating’ freaks (most of us can really eat and I mean really); ‘gossip’ freaks; ‘sarcastic’ freaks; ‘cute’ freaks (like me who always like to say so); ‘chill’ freaks etc practically u name it, u have it. But it’s just who we are and I can proudly proclaim that I love this group and I have never regretted to stay in this group even though in the beginning I had the chance to change to another group, I think my life will be pretty boring not being here.

Another amusing thing about my group is that everyday each of us takes turn to PMS or like what my group mates like to say takes the ‘bitch’ pill, but somehow we learn to bear and live with it and in a way we actually get to like each other for who we really are. No doubts we do have ‘cat fights’ and arguments but at the end of the day we apologize and don harbor hatred over it. That’s one thing I really like about them they are real (well maybe sometimes too real). And to my group mates I really love u guys.

POWER OF TOUCH OF A PHYSICIAN

Touch is a very important element or criteria for a physician. Physician have to touch (general examination, palpation, percussion, auscultation) to know what is wrong with the patient and what kind of diagnosis we should put.

But sad to say we're now living in a 'low touch culture' where we (even many physicians, medical students) are so reluctant to touch. We're scared or anxious that we may be infected with that particular disease, or sickness if we touch the patient, we're scared to do enemas as it's so dirty. Well is this what doctors are suppose to do? just look at the patient from a far without even touching them and then give a diagnosis.

Well, no doubt we must be careful, we can wear gloves and mask ( to protect both doctors and patient), but that does not mean that we should avoid touching patient. Touch is very important as it brings comfort, security, love and care to the patient showing them that we as doctors do care and we're not being a doctor due to higher 'status' or pay.

One thing i learn most from my university is that the nurses and doctors here are not afraid to touch the patients, when we go visit some patient in their wards the doctor (my lecturers), while asking them about their medical history will sit beside them, touch them gently while examining and showing us stuff and at the same time will ask us to touch the patient to feel signs like splenomegamy, hepatomegaly, types of rashes, etc (doesn't matter whether what disease the patient has).

Another time is when i did my attachment back in Malaysia last year during my holidays in KLGH, i was assigned to the medical ward with a small compartment for the infectious disease patient. And there's this doctor in particular (medical consultant) whom i followed, he was not afraid to go in to this infectious compartment with TB patients and to touch them and examined them, and to tell the truth i really respected him and was touched by what he did.

Many times we as medical students are so reluctant to touch them but I'm learning the art of 'touch' as I realizes it's importance day by day. We as doctors or future doctors should realize that we need to touch our patient doesn't matter whether are they dirty or clean; their socioeconomic status, or whatever disease they may have even infectious diseases like TB, Hepatitis, meningococcal infection, skin diseases. We just have to put ourselves into their shoes, how would we feel if our attending physician is not willing to come near us to examine us when we're sickly lying in the hospital bed, it's definitely a depressed and alienated feeling. so would we want our patients to fell that way?

ENDURANCE

Yesterday i went to the phone company in Moscow (MGTS) to inquire why can't we apply the internet line yet (we're suppose o able to apply the internet line 2 weeks ago), and the lady there says that they are not able to do so due to some reason which i not quite understand as they speak in difficult Russian (well even though I'm here for 5 years already, that does not mean i can understand everything they say, right?). well the only part i got was that we (those who are sharing this line) have to wait for another month to be able to apply this internet line. When i heard this i was like man....... this is bad as i really need to use the internet desperately (I've been living without it for the pass 2 months and it's so inconvenient especially for someone who is like staying away from home with tones of medical research and homework to do), especially this month of April as I'm having my surgery cycle which require me to hand up projects every class.

But somehow i recall my friend using this wireless internet service known as Golden Wifi, what i got to do is just to buy the internet card (500rub to use unlimitedly for a month), and make sure my computer can detect this wireless server. So on my way back to my hostel, i went to about 7 shops in 7 different locations and they all told me that they did not had any stock, i was like crying out God why is this happening to me? why must I go through this? Haven't i been praying enough? but somehow there's this voice inside me that told me not to give up, continue to have faith and trust in God, so with that small faith that i had, i went into my last choice, a shop in the market near my hostel and Thank God there it was the last internet card. Man...i was like in awe, in awe of how God works (even though u may think it's a small thing, but to me it speaks a lot).

Then the 1st thing i do when i was able to log on to the internet was to listen to this sermon on endurance by pastor Tan Ye Peng from CHC. it's was like a reminder on what God has brought me through and an encouragement also on not giving up in whatever circumstances that we may be in.

2cor6:4 In everything that we do we try to show that we are true ministers of God. We patiently endure troubles and hardships and calamities of every kind.

E- Embrace God's purpose in that situation.
N- nurture our roots in God's word
D- Direct our attention to Jesus Christ
U- Use our experience to help others
R- Rely on God's power
E- Expect God to bless us and to give us a breakthrough

God did not save people to enter the race, but to finish the race well.

1ST TIME BLOGGING

Well before this I've heard many things about blogs. People or friends write about themselves, what they had been through or reading other's blogs finding it interesting, amusing or irritated by what was written in it. Now i finally have the chance to experience this feeling. i hope I'll have a fun time doing so and at the same time i wish that what i write here will be a blessing or encouragement to others who read this.